How to Interpret the Story of Your Life With Narrative Psychology
Stories and Storytelling gives meaning to people's experience. How will the story of your life unfold and how does it help you look at the world?
After reading the tweet thread above, I got sucked down a wonderful internet rabbit hole. First, from googling the word “‘Mythologising.” Then, that took me to a perspective in psychology called, Narrative Psychology.
Narrative Psychology is,
“a field in psychology that investigates the value of stories and storytelling in giving meaning to individuals' experiences—shaping their memory of past events, their understanding of the present, and their projections of future events—and in defining themselves and their lives.” (source)
and…
“In the realm of narrative psychology, a person’s life story is not a Wikipedia biography of the facts and events of a life, but rather the way a person integrates those facts and events internally—picks them apart and weaves them back together to make meaning.” (source)
And according to ChatGPT, Narrative Psychology is…
“At its core, narrative psychology emphasizes the idea that people make sense of the world around them and construct their own identities and life stories through the act of storytelling. This means that our experiences and behaviors are not just the result of external events or circumstances, but also of the stories we tell ourselves and others about those events.
Narrative psychology also recognizes that storytelling is not just a way of describing or representing the world, but is actually a way of actively shaping it. By telling stories about ourselves and our experiences, we are able to create meaning and purpose in our lives, and to connect with others on a deeper level.
Some key concepts within narrative psychology include the idea of "narrative coherence," which refers to the degree to which a person's life story makes sense and is consistent with their experiences and beliefs; and the idea of "narrative identity," which refers to the way in which a person's sense of self is constructed through the stories they tell about themselves.”
Boy, that AI LMM sure is handy. I finally signed up for access to ChatGPT. There will be more substack posts about it in the future. But I digress.
Today, I want to try and unpack this idea of Narrative Psychology and what it means to “create ourselves” through the use of storytelling. I find it fascinating, as it feels like I’ve come upon a secret of the universe. Or I’m about to ‘crack the code’ of How to be a Human.
I will try and break down elements of a story and how they can be analogous to our lives. For example, characters and the roles they play in a story.
Before we can develop our own personal character, that is, the distinct qualities that makes you…you, let’s take a look at characters one can ‘play’ and the roles that we can ‘act out’ in our lives.
Characters and Roles
We experience the world through the story of our life. People who you meet are the characters, things you’ve done are the plot lines, what you’ve learned are the themes.
What characters and roles do you play in your life?
Roles like: father, mother, sister, brother, son, or daughter.
Characters like: martial artist, athlete, drummer, singer, songwriter, or gamer.
One time my wife and I were chatting about something I do not remember. But, she said to me something that I recall now and then, it went like, “You’re a guy with many interests and you do them just because you enjoy them, not because you have to, I love that about you.” That was a nice compliment. But it got me thinking, what is my identity? Posts like this and reading books help me parse through who I think I am. It’s a fun process.
Speaking of processes, having an idea of the roles you have in your life, can help you do, what Willam Randall calls, Self-Creation.
Think of yourself as a never ending, “self-as-a-project”. Discovering who you are, the things you like and don’t like. Even at the age of 37, I’m still discovering those things with myself.
Take some time to think about the characters and roles you inhabit, and how they help create who you are.
For example, I’m a brother, son, uncle, and husband. I also try to act like a martial artist (BJJ) , a drummer, a writer (hobbyist), and various support roles. These are the ways that I present myself to the world. They are the jobs I have, the relationships I have, and the hobbies I have.
Not only do the roles we play have to do with our actions and hobbies, but there are other types of characters we take-on such as: the protagonist, the antagonist, the love interest, the confidant, and the villain.
Be honest, throughout your life you have been the hero and the villain. Me too. It’s easy to think of times that we were helping and saving people, or times that we were hurting and being selfish to other people. Right now, the images and memories that are coming into our minds - of how we played out each of those roles - is exactly how we think of our lives as stories.
The Story of Your Life: The Four Levels
According to Willam Randall EdD,
“When I refer to ‘the story of my life,’ I may be making a number of associations in my mind all at once: the events of my life themselves (whether minor or main); my memories of those events (which may be quite a different matter); the autobiography I might eventually write; or the biography I hope (or fear) someone else might write of me […] To do so, I propose that if the concept of story applies to a life at all, then that application is in relation to one or the other, or some combination, of four possible levels: existence, experience, expression, and impression.” (source)
Existence - “this level is simply the sum total of everything I have ever done, said, thought, or felt, in all the different dimensions of my life”
Experience - “It is the realm of what cognitive scientists call autobiographical memory […] The inner story is the sum total not of what actually happened but only of my memories or impressions of it”
Expression - “It is ‘my life’ in the sense of what I present or project to the world. It is my ‘life-story’ as I communicate it to others”
Impression - “It is ‘my life’ in the sense of what is made of me by others. It is my ‘life-history’ in the sense of what is told of me by others”
Another way to frame and structure the Story of Your Life, think of these four levels. First, the sum total of everything you have done. Second, your memories. Third, what you tell others about yourself. Fourth, what others say about you.
How do all these levels fit and work together?
“In computer terms, the outside story [Existence] is the hardware of my system. The inside story [Experience] is both the software and the collection of directories and files that I have assembled with its aid – including the particular file I am into at the moment, a portion of which fills the screen. Finally, the inside-out [Expression] story is the hard copy I decide to print off for distribution to others, while the outside-in [Impression] is their interpretation of the text of that copy.”
Defining Yourself
The whole point of this post, is to use all this info about Narrative Psychology, to stand back and look at the broad scope of who you are, and to see if your are on a path you actually enjoy and is meaningful for you. That’s what I’ve been doing since reading about Narrative Psychology.
For example, I like the roles I’m playing: brother, son, uncle, husband. But I can always make improvements on all of those areas of my life, and pursue more meaningful avenues of self discovery to become a well-rounded human. That’s the plan, anyway.
And it’s okay if you don’t know completely who you are, almost none of us do. We all change and grow throughout our lives, as you know.
Think of the type of person you want to be. The character(s) you want to play. And the role you want to be known for. Those, plus your collective memories and the narratives you tell yourself and others, will ultimately help construct the person you want to be and hopefully can give your life meaning and a meaningful purpose.
Also, using the Four Levels of The Story of Your Life - everything you are, everything inside of you, everything you tell people about you, and what others say about you - can help map out and plan and direct and prepare and create, the version of yourself you want to become.
Of course there will be obstacles, external and internal. Internal obstacles like limiting beliefs in yourself. External obstacles like other people trying to turn you off course. But having the full story, up until this point, is a great approach to writing the story of your life.